Tag Archives: Narcissists

Narcissist Beat Down Reality Show Style

narcissism-its-all-about-me-01The Narcissist. ICK factor on steroids. A toxic poison that has flooded like a tsunami into our lives these days, drowning us with its vicious suffocating torturous chant of “MeMeMe” and then more of Me!

It’s nauseating to say the least, but popular, as it leeches into people’s minds like maggots feasting on garbage, thru the media, with it’s hyper self indulgent reality shows, it’s sickening, gluttonous food shows, it’s gossip rags, it’s Selfie Nation members, and it’s FaceBook worshippers. Yea, it’s all here and it is revolting, and to steal a popular quote from back in the day – Get Used to It! But only to those whose vision is amped up, actually see the spectacle as it is. The emperor minus the clothes trick. Meaning-  a joke on everybody. Everybody is getting played. The synchophanatic public media minions are being played for fools as these self- lovers get their thrills, their finances, their gaudy houses, their phony lovers,  and their heinous plastic faces, from JQPUBLIC!  HELLO……!!!???

facebook-narcissist-02Narcissism. Who even knew what that word meant 30 years ago? Or ten years ago? Not me. And I had a close relationship with one.  Intentionally, and innocently. A dangerous combo. The 4th cocktail you should NOT have drunk. The absinthe mixed with brandy, Toulouse Lautrec kept stashed in a vial in his walking stick, always available for easy consumption, also lethal. “The Maiden Blush, The Earthquake,” his death defying cocktail mixes were similar to the tightrope walking that people engage in with narcissists. One step over and you are a dead man. Or woman.

narcissist-test-03Who  could anticipate the  the trap,  that messy, nasty, ugly, mucky,  quicksand that engaging in a relationship with a narcissist could create?

Reality shows today depict these JackHoles as glamorous, wealthy, successful cool, people to be envied and imitated. We know that in reality, and I mean in Real Time, they are anything but cool. The Out of Time, Out of Mind Opposite!  Like the naive individuals who get trapped in the narcissist quicksand, the reality shows, of today’s television cable money machine  also trap the viewers in their own gravity defying void  of self-love indulgent shock value hype. The so -called misnomer -“reality shows ” is actual money, ego ,maniacal behavior, materialism, lust ,and superficiality posing  as a desirable quest where in truth, the reality is the unreality. Truth is Fiction in that world.

Are you getting it?

The truth is the lie.

The lie is the truth.

But it’s all good as long as JQ pays for it.


narcissist-traits-04The so-called misnomer of reality shows is actually non reality!  But years ago, nobody knew or cared about the danger of narcissist/sociopaths, while today the minions are equally naive about the danger of falling into the empty abyss that these reality shows , this Facebook Fantasy World, this Selfie obsession , can bring to the mental miasma of the everyday follower.

With each and every click of a Kim K story, a Beverly Hills HouseWhore, a Million-Air- Head matchmaker, an Atlanta hood housewive, or a Duggar – pay as we proliferate – it doesn’t matter who or what, fact is that  we are making them RICH. Giving  attention to those who have nothing except the straight out nerve to flaunt their shit on a public forum for us to “get jiggy with it.”UGH.

Truth hurts.

narcissistic-personality-disorder-05The viewer becomes a victim of the “narcissistic supply source ” the necessary crack cocaine fix that fills his crazy sicko need, satisfying the neurotic craving like any street crack head.

The reason these people put themselves out there is NARCISSISM. They need US to keep them alive,  breathing,  and worthy of the life they try to  live,  that is sooo not worthy.

It takes two to tango.

Kerouac needed Cassidy and vice versa.

Pollack needed his equally talented wife, Lee Krasner, to keep afloat, painting future masterpieces, until even she couldn’t save him!

selfie-narcissist-06Picasso, narcissist imperial , sucked the blood vampire style, out of every woman who had the misfortune to know him.

Gertrude Stein played Queen of the May to her lackey at command , Alice B.  Toklas , so she could experience the luxury of spinning out her repetitive literary drivel . And,  yes,  the rose remains a rose, no matter what.

Anais Nin, spent a lifetime recording her every mundane thought in journals, eventually published, recounting the narcissistic personality disorder afflicting her life, and destroying every relationship she fooled the naive into. How else would she manage to keep TWO husbands simultaneously???? Two husbands, multiple lovers, the most profound being her own love of HERSELF!!!!

teresa-guidice-flips-table-07The vampire needs a body to stay alive. The narcissist needs the minions supply, including neediness, low self esteem, dysfunction, attention, worship, praise, interest, admiration, in order to breathe, just  like the vampire needs  blood.

Noticing the increasing stories online, of the lovelorn,  their hideous experiences with narcissists,  over the past year I realized  that now that it has been exposed on many sociological levels,  from the bedroom to the boardroom,  television, cinema,  the internet,  the selfie, facebook,  it is out there ——

And needs to be checked!!!!!!

why-do-narcissists-ignore-you-10Anyone who has had the misfortune to be in a relationship with a Narcissist,  male, or female , has been Schooled! Aware  of its insidious danger. it’s Jekyll and Hyde duplicity, it’s empty shell psychosis, it’s un empathetic DNA ,  it’s insanity. Watch out! These TV shows,  and the selfie nation, the facebk phenomena,compadres, unified in their Me First needs,  are all components of the narcissist play book,  toxic  as powerfull arsenic, lethal as Lautrec’s EarthQuake Cocktail. ready to maim, kill, and destroy at the moment of pleasure !

lisa-vanderpump-09The Narc has no feelings of empathy for anyone . ANYONE. They just don’t give a shit. They play by their own invented sadistic rules. Other people do not count. The players in the “Reality”shows are no different. They care only about their image,  the mirror, the mask, the mirage,  they submit on their resume  to the needy public,  desperate to be entertained, empty lives, on the clock, numbed, coddled, pacified, as they watch people expose revolting examples of inhumanity, in their personal lives,  in the name of entertainment with payback. Or  paycheck. Ugh. It’s a No Fly Zone for the mind and if you enter – do so with caution because it’s extremely lethal.

patti-stranger-millionaire-matchmaker-08We may have the misfortune of watching ” NeNe ” and her sycophants,  or “Vanderpump” and her crew, ” Kimmye” and her ass, or the ” Millionaire Matchmaker”,  who seems to have a hard time getting matched up herself,  but poses as  an expert, to the unquestioning public, selling her shtick with her foul mouthed vulgarities pushing the desperate phonies into sudo fake relationships for their own narcissistic gain.

Who  wants to Meet a Millionaire?  she screeches ???!!!!!!

Have we really succumbed to that low level of desperation? Where we watch a woman who is Old and Single  to tell US how to find love? Yes we have and it’s pathetic. Narcissism. On. Steroids.

kardashian-narcissism-12Kim K? What IS that? Her ass, her sex partners, her fake wedding, her bikini wax, her new book “Selfish”????? Only today would something that irrelevant fly!

Where’s the LOVE? Not the self- love or a.k.a. love of self. The love we identify as Unconditional? Where did it go? The love William Blake  speaks of in his soulful poetry, or Kahlil Gibran in his epic, ” The Prophet”, or Henry Miller,  in his lusty tropics , or Kerouac in his journey down the “road”, or Hemingway,  sitting in La Closerie des Lilas in Paris, scribbling in his journals waiting for a breakthrough, or Rilke , poet incarnate,  lovelorn, wandering the lonely streets of Paris , scribbling poems , searching for his next meal,  or Armistead Maupin, describing his San Francisco tales of gay life in the  sixties, ” Tales of the City”,  or the indomitable Patty Smith in “Just Kids”,  her autobiographical story of  life with acclaimed photographer, Robert Mapplethorpe  in Greenwich  Village during the early 60’s. This was the Real Deal! No reality show necessary!

why-do-narcissists-ignore-you-10What we have now is an empty fake take on love , falsified by our reality tv icons , posing as cool and gorgeous and hip and rich,  selling their bs to the subservient public who make these idiots rich, famous, and popular,  by a mere click of the remote sending them further and further into fame and fortune. It’s a trivial pursuit of celebrity status , egos built on the publics shallow needs.

When will we stop? Will we stop?

Maybe it’s time for something new?

You THiNK????????

Nick & Amy | Tricking the Narcissist

Gone-Girl-Gillian-Flynn** Spoiler Alert – Parts of the movie “Gone Girl” are described in the post below **

Nick and Amy. Amy and Nick. Who are they really? Characters in Gillian Flynns novel transformed into the sensational cinema hit “Gone Girl. Nick the malignant narcissist. Amy, his borderline sociopathic wifey.  The imperfect beautiful couple. I went down to Union Square, in NYC, to the Regal theatre located in the epicenter of the most plugged in center of the universe! I needed a distraction and, being a reading addict of the grossest proportions, read this gem 2 years ago, knew the plot line, and was curious to see the plot unfold in technicolor before my eyes. The theatre was packed,  jamming with 20, 30, 40, New York City hipsters , boomer, tourists, all eager to watch the suspenseful debacle unfold!

The book presented an attention grabbing dissection of two young married people fronting, posing, pretending ,ultimately unravelling, the energy of their toxic emotions exploding, their psychological dysfunction, their blatant narcissism, their empty souls spewing cinders of their crumbling relationship. Love gone wrong.

This film, portrays a scenario, where “WHO are you?” Is key. Nick thinks he knows his wife, but nothing could be further from the truth! While caught in his narcissistic web, Amy plots in full view his demise. She will not allow him to escape without paying for his dismissive, inattentive failure as her husband.

texts-about-gone-girl-movieThe seventies movie, ” Waiting  for Mr. Goodbar,” reminds  me of the neurotic interplay where you know the characters are dodging a mental minefield, a neurotic brainstorm, which could explode at any moment. Yet, they seem so charming, so friendly, so attractive! And it’s all a facade. A lie. Like Amy and Nick. Pure crap!

Many artists share that mentality. The genius/narcissist promoting himself as god, while simultaneously torturing the people who have the misfortune of fate to show up in their personal lives. Ugh. It’s the crazy maker looking for that special candy, feeding his hunger for more crazy. The crazy that makes him feel ALIVE! Picasso did it with his many submissive women, victimizing, abusing, ruining them, and…….Gertrude Stein, with her self indulgent, obsessive writing, that insane repetition and her statements of deluded grandeur!  Road kill incarnate! Can’t stop reading, while loathing her narcissistic ploy as she identifies as “genius” .

gertrude-stein-narcissistStein cuts and caters to the artists in her ex-pat Parisienne world. She makes or breaks by her acceptance or her rejection, the artists seeking recognition. Stein, star – maker incarnate, unsurpassed in her mind of complete authority and power! She pens the “Autobiography of Alice B. Toklas.” In it she pretends she is her lover, Alice, writing through her mind’s eye. In it, she identifies her take on real genius. There are three. Picasso. Herself. And Alfred Whitehead. No shit Sherlock!  Only a narcissist could write ” a rose is a rose is a rose” and call it literature! But she is not alone! There are so many others. Ever read the journals of Anais Nin?

In Norman Mailer’s expose, “Genius and Lust,” he delves into the artist/gertrude-stein-narcissistnarcissist enigma, with a scalpel, revealing the complicated world the narcissist dwells, especially in the artist role relating to another artist also narcissistic. Miller and his lover, June-two narcissists , recounted in his 1600 page novel, depicting his affair and marriage, “The Rosy Crucifixion”. A complete failure as a novel, because as Mailer’ critique states, “the narcissist suffers from too much inner dialogue. These words turn us away from the psychic reality. The narcissist is the scientist and the experiment in one.” It’s a turn off.

anais-nin-narcissist-06Miller’s lover and literary cohort, Anais Nin, shared the bond of loving themselves more than they could ever really love each other, in spite of their rapturous physical love affair. Nin’s journals are love letters to herself. They are written on infinite pages,  gushing word vomit, about her, from her, into her, etc. If you manage to get through one of her famous “Diaries”, you will be so overwhelmed by her personality and throbbing EGO, that the prospect of reading another is daunting! I dare you to try! Every thought, every idea in her head, is placed on her personal operating table for dissection. She performs the autopsy and, and the results are her own. anais-ninWhatever she wants them to be. Nin is detached and aloof to other people unless they are as consumed with her as she is with herself. An impossible task, because her narcissism is all consuming.  Miller, himself the obvious protagonist, in his “Tropic of Cancer” , and the rest of his  tropics, is the center, the beginning ,middle, and end of his realistic fiction, unraveling the tales of  his starving, lust consumed days in Paris. On and on he goes, leaving nothing out, he is so important and simultaneously so grotesque. “Narcissists after all do not hand emotion back and forth through their bodies so much as they induce emotion in one another through their minds.” Nin and Miller. Miller and June, “electric and empty, perfect and hollow” – Mailer says it !

picasso-narcissistPicasso, also a narcissist, his self love, reveals an ultimate disregard, a brutality, towards the women in his life, described vividly in Francois Gilot’s  “Life with Picasso”. Picasso was the center and circumference of his being, and the specks of humanity he encountered outside were irrelevant. His art was the penultimate cause d’être of his being. Ferdinand Olivier, his first love, was treated like his slave, as she froze and starved while he toiled away in the Bateau Lavoir, proving his genius, painting canvas after canvas, while keeping his prisoner captive in the pitiful shack of a studio, not letting her go out unless he accompanied her, as she froze, huddled on a straw cot, trying to keep their love alive, through her worship of her lover’s art.

But the narcissist fails in this in the end, because the underlying problem with the narcissist is boredom. “Vanity is the antidote to claustrophobia.” It is the reason narcissists like Miller, Picasso, Nin, are forever falling out of love, jobs, places, and addictions.” Mailer has his magnifying glass, highlighting this phenomena in his “Genius and Lust.” Boredom is the catalyst that sends the narcissist hunting for new supply to live his otherwise empty life with the blood of his new chosen victim.

the-sociopath-next-door-bookIn “Gone Girl”, we observe the classic narcissist husband floundering in their marital cesspool with his borderline wife. What a crazy mix, a real bond, they possess, feeding off each other in their vampiristic thirst for survival. Of course, they destroy themselves individually, and each other, as their need to consume the others attention becomes fatal, when satiated, they are left alone to  drown  in their own personal self love.  These two neurotics cannot exist as a couple. Impossible! As Amy festers in her rage and the need to exact revenge and punish Nick, Nick portrays the ultimate narcissistic failed artist. The writer who quits, delusioned, but so self-absorbed, he is oblivious to the contained rage his wife is consumed with. The narcissist’s attention is all about him, blind to what’s going on around him, only to be shocked when the blowback spins him back into reality! Reality is not pretty for the artist narcissist, living in a dream world of himself and the art he creates. It is difficult to see anyone outside of that bubble world. Diego Rivera’s relationship with Frieda Kahlo was one of the Narcissist with the sickly borderline female. Textbook. His multiple affairs, and personal successes in the art world left little for her, but she clung in  desperate dependence , accepting her second place status as all she could maintain in his life. Her death would not be from her paralyzingly illness, but Rivera’s abandonment of her! She hung on for “dear life”.

gone-girl-movie-nick-amy-04In “Gone Girl”, Amy does fight back, as she attempts to hold onto a shred of pride, as she sees Nick’s abandonment as a cruel betrayal.  She is not about to allow him to win! Her revenge is exact, thorough, and evil. He is left spinning in the wind, her intent, a success, until the end where we are left with a question. Who is the real winner here in this twisted psycho drama?

artist-narcissistsThe life of the artist, in whatever the particular genre may be is one of focus, isolation, imagination, and genius. These qualities can lead to an over obsession with ones own inner life to the extreme. Often there is nothing left for anyone else. The failed artist is at risk for this as his failure won’t be accepted or admitted to, but rather the fault of extenuating circumstances, people, events. Nick, the failed writer had to find another exciting channel, to obtain the supply narcissists thrive on. The vampire’s blood so to speak.  Amy had to punish him, in order to claim his attention once again. And like the vampire draining his victim, of their life’s blood, their pursuit of more victims continues to keep them alive. The hunt makes the victims being pursued ru . The vampire needs the supply, in order to live. His victims need the narcissistic vampire in order to feel alive! Their death is his life! While his life becomes their death! A paradox intrinsic in every narcissists life!

Truth or Fiction????

Like Amy?

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